“The pastor’s first call is not to envision a church but to receive one.”
Chase Replogle, Pastor & Author
My experience in church ministry would tell me that for many afforded the title of pastor, it’s easier to proclaim a ‘mission’ with a community they feel called to lead than to nurture belonging with a parish they are given to serve.
Of course, in a healthy community it is possible to embody both belonging & shared mission. But in churches and organizations that do harm, the dignity of image bearers is sacrificed in favor of their enlistment. Even the idea of “mission” quickly becomes entangled with institutional self-interest. When people become of secondary importance to expansion projects, a church becomes the steward of religious violence rather than relationships.
The opposite of a church held hostage by ungodly ambition is a people formed inwardly by embassies of refuge, shared weakness, and welcome. This kind of ‘congregation’ comes in many forms and does not require 501(c)(3) status. Whenever you encounter it, you will also find shepherds who reflect the same disarming receptivity. The vocation of a pastor begins with the internal vow never to ‘make use of’ other human beings, but to love others with a hospitality that insists their humanity is never reduced.
Receive Their Stories
A pastor who has cultivated his or her own receptive presence is eager to receive the sacredness of another’s story. This is how people are grafted in from being merely visitors to cherished members. Men who court violence perceive people only as loyalists or threats, so apart from their assimilation their stories are irrelevant. Pastors who can be trusted, on the other hand, are men and women who believe that anyone who has a story (that’s all of us) has a stake in belonging to the body of Christ.
Shepherds who foster story-holding community protect relationships from becoming transactional. False shepherds ask first, “what can you do for us?” Pastors governed by the life of Jesus ask, “what can we do to make room for you?” and, “how can we honor your story?”
Receive Their Pain
What is pastoring if not holding the pain and suffering of others in the light of hope? Those of us who call ourselves shepherds dare not approach a person’s languishing as cold and moralistic detectives, but as eyewitnesses to the character reflected in their grief.
If pastors exempt themselves from being compassionate listeners of others’ desolation and doubt, they indict themselves as ivory tower executives—or “kingdom” spokesmen—who defame the notion of spiritual authority. By contrast, when shepherds attend to people’s pain with tender receptivity, they usually find that the pain becomes the only teacher in the room. Almost every time I absorb a person’s sorrow as a minister or friend, I respect them more deeply. I remember to cherish their being in the community as a gift, regardless of their doing.
Receive Their Limits
One of the chief prerogatives of a loving shepherd is to recognize the limits of others in order to enfold them as vital participants; “…those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable…” (1 Cor. 12:22) Not only do we enfold and empower those with physical disabilities, etc., but we recognize that all of us have limitations to be honored. It is incumbent upon pastors not to subvert the human limits of individuals and families (especially in service of institutions), but to bless those limitations as good.
Not everyone can “show up and sign up.” Church buildings and programs should never be the sun around which members must orbit in order to belong. Rather than heavy-handed messaging about people ‘going to church’, shepherds attuned to limits invite a culture of going to people—and receiving the beauty and fidelity of their everyday lives.
Receive Their Gifts
One of the greatest privileges of a pastor is to steward the spiritual and vocational gifts of those under their care. Tragically, many unqualified clergy believe it is their job to control people instead, due to their own internal scarcity. It may be the case that many church “leaders” fail to receive the gifts of others because they first failed to receive their stories: the narratives and hardships out of which so many vocational gifts are born.
Perhaps even worse than neglecting to honor a person’s gifts is the exploitive religious leader’s impulse to merely leverage them. Most people with even an inkling of intuition know at a visceral level the difference between being empowered and being groomed. By contrast, receptive pastors invest the time to listen to your dreams and longings. They call forth the artistry of God in you, then take a front row seat to watch you flourish.
An Antidote To Abuse
Profound relational ruptures are imminent when those in power profess a ‘mission from God’ as the immutable end that justifies whatever injurious means are wielded to achieve it.
The antidote to abuse begins with the inner life and relational intelligence of pastors who neither recruit people first as laborers nor reward people as loyalists, but who receive people as worthy to be known—whether for two days or two decades.
The receptivity of pastors—a reflection of inward character often marginalized in favor of self-assuredness—is an expression of both humility and gratitude. It is fundamentally the resolve to open one’s hands in deference to the Spirit’s unpredictable movement, both in our own lives and in the lives of those we serve. It is the maturity to relinquish outcomes. It’s the ability to receive weakness and suffering as crucibles of our formation; and the insistence to celebrate others rather than stunt them for fear of losing power.
When searching for shepherds you can trust, don’t get swept away by their intelligence or ambition. Investigate their presence. Are they fixated on “leading” people and leveraging your utility? Or are they eager to receive you? And if necessary, sacrifice to ensure your belonging?
Thank you for these words- they are medicine to my wounded heart! Keep writing brother- your gifts are needed today in the Body of Christ.
Whoa. You captured something in words that has eluded my articulation. I will use this entry in my credentials interviews and training of pastors from here on out.